I asked Rei to find some fun photos that we can use for daily lessons, and there is one in particular that made us laugh.

Before we take a look at it, though, there is a word that I want to explain: 痴漢 (ちかん).

If you look in a dictionary, it will say that a 痴漢 (ちかん) is a "molester" or a "pervert." While these are not necessarily incorrect definitions, I think some of the cultural nuance gets lost.

Let's look at a J-J dictionary entry:

痴漢：電車の中や夜道などで，女性にみだらないたずらをする男。
ちかん： でんしゃ　の　なか　や　よみち　など　で、 じょせい　に　みだらな　いたずら　を　する　おとこ。
Chikan: A man that accosts a woman sexually in a (public) place such as a train or on a dark street.
Literally: "chikan: + train + の + inside + や + street at night + and so on + で, + woman + に + improper / dirty + (obscene) mischief + を + do + man."

You'll notice that my translation is quite different than the literal breakdown. But the direct translation of "improper mischief towards a woman" does not really explain what a chikan does: Assault women sexually in public places. I've seen it translated as "groper," but I'm just going to put chikan in this lesson.

Anyways, if you walk around in Japan, you'll see lots of posters warning people not to act like chikan:

痴漢は犯罪です！
ちかん　は　はんざい　です！
Sexual assault is a crime! // Groping is a crime!
Literally: "chikan + は + crime + is!"

あなたの一生台無しに！
あなた　の　いっしょう　だいなしに！
You will ruin your entire life!
Literally: "you + の + whole life + ruined + に."

痴漢です！！
ちかん　です！！
I'm being sexually assaulted! // It's a chikan!
Literally: "chikan + is."

痴漢ですって？
ちかん　です　って？
Did you say "chikan?"
Literally: "chikan + is + って?"

犯罪だ！
はんざい　だ！
That's a crime!
Literally: "crime + だ！"

どうしました！！
What's the matter?!
Note: You should absolutely memorize this phrase. The same goes for the casual version: どうした？

みんなの勇気と声で痴漢撲滅
みんな　の　ゆうき　と　こえ　で　ちかん　ぼくめつ
With everyone's voice and bravery, we can eliminate groping [chikan // sexual assaults].
Literally: "everyone + の + bravery + と + voice + で + chikan + extermination."

Anyways, we need to know what a chikan is to understand the hilarious image we're looking at today.

Recently, a group of kids got to participate in an awesome field trip. They went to the Supreme Court to conduct a mock trial!

最高裁判所
さいこう　さいばんしょ
The Supreme Court
Literally: "highest / supreme + courtroom."

While there, a chikan was put on trial, and one of the young presiding judges had the following to say:

少年裁判長
しょうねん　さいばんちょう
Juvenile Presiding Judge

弁護人や検事の言うことが分からなかった。
べんごにん　や　けんじ　の　いう　こと　が　わからなかった。
I didn't understand what the lawyers were talking about.
Literally: "defending counsel+ や + public prosecutor + の + say + thing + が + did not understand."
Note: I just put "lawyers," because it seemed like overkill to say "defending counsel" and "public prosecutor."

痴漢はひどいので、とりあえず死刑にしてみた。
ちかん　は　ひどい　ので、 とりあえず　しけい　に　してみた。
Since chikan are horrible, for the time being I decided to give him the death penalty.
Literally: "chikan + は + horrible / awful + because [＝ので], + for the time being + death penalty + に + tried out doing."

That's one tough judge.

The fact that the young judge is giving the defendant the death penalty is shocking enough, but the really funny parts are this とりあえず and ～してみた.

Saying とりあえず could mean "for now; for the time being" or it could mean "anyways." Rei and I were torn about which to use for the translation, as it's not entirely clear. Our guess was "for now," though, based on the rest of the sentence's formation grammatically. Either options is funny, though.

Second, saying ～してみた means "tried doing." Not in the sense of attempting something difficult, but rather in the sense of trying something out to see how you like it. It's something you "try out" on a whim. For most, that would not include giving someone the death penalty.

We've seen the word とりあえず once before, in this lesson: [NDL #56] - Cool Phrases for Izakaya & Restaurants.

And in the very next lesson, we looked at ～てみる: [NDL #57] - Try Doing VS Try to Do.

And in our next lesson (tomorrow), I'll be introducing several uses of some words we just saw. Get excited and whatnot. ^^